(:

Sunday, August 24, 2008

I guess i have been lying to myself for a long time already... how can i be so stupid??? she has never loved me... yet i deceived myself into a one way love... something that i have given alot, yet nothing comes back... nothing...

She is really the only one i have given the best i could... no one else can replace her... but i... i have never been someone that she would think of having a relationship with...

But who am i kidding??? i am just a below then average person... i don't have a great figure and neither am i handsome... in fact... i look worse than the average singaporean... worst of all... i suck in studies and exercise, and have very bad personal and even worse habits... who would want me as their boyfriend???

i really loved her and did everything i could to make her happy... but it seems i was the one that makes her frown... i guess i really did lie to myself... so now... i just have to deal with it...

But, it appears that every time i think of her, i get a very weird and empty feeling... it's not something which is very nice... but i just can't get rid of it... i seriously have to do something about it... Teddie tried to help me... but i still will think of it and feeling gets worse... i even thought of hurting myself... i guess that's the price to pay for being so stupid...

frm
mousey

Till death shall i know...